The 3 Step System For Improving Self Esteem
By improving your self esteem you will not need to go through another situation where you end up missing out on an opportunity you cared so much for due to being a bunch of nerves. Not that you will not feel any nervousness but you will be able to function and present yourself in such a way that the opportunity will be yours.
For instance the next time you meet that interesting, attractive person, you will be able to communicate with them in a relaxed self confident way. Or how about going for an interview? Being able to answer any questions in a clear calm manner without feeling all horribly nervy will be also much better.
Improving your self esteem is a key aspect of improving your life. As you become more confident you will also acquire more drive to go out and meet people, take on more challenging situations and on the whole be more willing to explore new possibilities in both your personal and working life. As you build your self esteem life becomes more fun.
Follow this 3 Step System For Improving Self Esteem and start enjoying a more satisfying and exciting life.
Improving Self Esteem Step 1: Look Inside Yourself
Do you trust yourself? Do you listen to your own thoughts and value them? Or do you just let yourself be taken over by what others say? If you will not trust you, who will? Start relying on yourself even if you make mistakes it is better to value your own inner voice than to always be ruled by the opinions of other people. Once you start to value your own opinion you will become more confident. It is important not to let yourself be undermined by negative talk. And anyway what someone else thinks of you is not your business. Your business is what you think of yourself and work with that. Even the most wonderful individuals will have some comments made to them or find themselves in situations that are not supportive at all. And do you think that they value those external opinions and happenings more than their own inner voice? Not at all. Validate yourself first by listening to your own ideas and others will start to validate you also. Boost self esteem by listening to your own inner knowing.
Action: Notice how you are letting yourself be influenced by external situations, advice, suggestions and criticism. Do they make you more self confident or less? You will probably see an undermining pattern that does not do you any good. Now that you are becoming aware of it you can do something about it.
Improving Self Esteem Step 2: Set A Goal
If you have not got a goal it is much harder to be decisive, after all you are not aiming for anything. By being goal orientated it is much easier to be self confident. As you focus on your path toward your goal you put more of your power out there and you feel less shy because you are not focusing on your own insecurities. And guess what as soon as you start doing that you are getting out of your own way and your insecurities will start to fall away. You will be more decisive and that goes hand in hand with improving self esteem. Knowing what goal to set is not hard. In fact it is easy enough when you start paying attention to your own inner voice.
Action: Carry a small notebook with you and write down any ideas that come to you. Do not judge them just write them down. Choose a time to sit down and ask yourself a few questions. What is important to you? What do you most enjoy doing? You could initially only write questions like that and when you sense an answer, write it down. You will start to distill ideas about what goals are important to you. Take a relatively easy, manageable goal to focus on first and go for more challenging ones as you build your own self esteem.
Improving Self Esteem Step 3: Mind What You Are Saying To Yourself
How do you address yourself as you go about your daily routine. Are you supportive or do you put yourself down? If you want to build your self esteem it is important to make positive empowering statements to yourself. Rather than putting yourself down, be forgiving and care for yourself like you might care for someone else. How would you talk to your best friend if they need to have a bit of a boost? Speak to yourself in that manner. Most people have a continuous inner commentary going on. By changing this to supportive inner chat you will help yourself more than you might imagine.
Action:Write down all the positive things about yourself however big or small. When your inner chat tells you something negative let it go and follow it straight away with one of your positive things. Example: “That was a really stupid thing to do. Ah but I am very good at cleaning the dishes (or for example: mowing the lawn, looking after animals, working on my own, whatever applies to you)”. If you forget to do this just carry on with it when you remember. You can also read out all your positive statements a few times a day. The more you do it the better you get at it.
By continuing to do these 3 steps you will improve your self esteem and confidence. Initially it will require some dedication and discipline but it will not take too long before it will become a natural part of your way of being. You will be more successful and happy which will build your confidence and esteem even more and so it continues to grow.
PS You can also check out the Improving self esteem article and other anxiety self help articles here on happylivingchoices.com
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